Leadership Is Influence — But What Kind of Influence Are You Creating?

This past weekend, a message on leadership as influence sparked a powerful reflection.

Years ago, I completed a simple yet confronting exercise:
I imagined what my wife, children, family, friends, and colleagues would say about the kind of influence I had on their lives — and compared it to what I wanted them to say.

The gap between those two perspectives was eye-opening.

It forced me to confront a hard truth:
👉 Leadership isn’t defined by intention — it’s defined by impact.

Since then, I’ve guided hundreds of leaders through this same exercise. And almost every time, the same tension emerges:

  • What would people say about your leadership today?

  • What do you want them to say?

That gap is where real leadership work begins.

The Hidden Gap: Résumé Virtues vs. Eulogy Virtues

There’s a powerful distinction that reshapes how we think about leadership:

Résumé virtues are what get you hired and promoted.
They include:

  • Skills

  • Achievements

  • Titles

  • Performance metrics

They look impressive on paper.

But they don’t define your legacy.

Eulogy virtues, on the other hand, are what people remember when you're not in the room — or no longer here.

They include:

  • Character

  • Integrity

  • Trust

  • Compassion

  • Courage

  • Service

These are the qualities that define your influence.

And here’s the problem:

👉 Most leaders spend their lives optimizing for résumé virtues — while neglecting the eulogy virtues that truly matter.

Ironically, many rise into leadership roles because of résumé virtues…
…but struggle to lead effectively because they never developed the human side of influence.

The Leadership Crisis We Can’t Ignore

The data tells a sobering story about the state of leadership today:

  • 75% of employees say their boss is the most stressful part of their day

  • 57% report experiencing toxic leadership

  • 56% are burned out

  • 76% are disengaged at work

  • Only 21% trust their leaders

This isn’t a small gap.

It’s a leadership crisis.

And the cost is massive:

  • Burnout

  • Disengagement

  • High turnover

  • Trillions lost globally

But beyond the numbers, there’s a deeper issue:

👉 Leadership influence is actively shaping people’s well-being — for better or worse.

What Happens When Leaders Align with Their True North

Now imagine a different kind of leadership.

One that is anchored in clarity, purpose, and character.

When leaders align with their True North, everything changes:

  • Trust becomes the foundation of culture

  • People feel seen, valued, and motivated

  • Creativity and collaboration increase

  • Resilience strengthens across teams

  • Leaders operate with clarity and consistency

And yes — the business impact follows:

  • 2.5× more innovation

  • 27% higher profitability

  • 400%+ ROI on leadership development

But more importantly:

👉 People thrive.

The Kind of Leadership That Leaves a Legacy

I experienced this kind of leadership firsthand through my grandfather.

He didn’t lead through titles or authority.

He led through presence.

Through how he made people feel:

  • Seen

  • Valued

  • Capable

His influence didn’t end with him.

It continues to ripple through the lives he touched.

That’s the power of eulogy-driven leadership.

That’s the kind of leadership that lasts.

A Question Every Leader Must Answer

Take a moment and ask yourself:

If people described your leadership today… would it match what you want to be remembered for?

If the answer is no — you’re not alone.

But you do have a choice.

You can:

  • Realign your leadership

  • Close the gap between intention and impact

  • Shift from résumé-driven success to legacy-driven influence

Because influence is inevitable.

👉 But legacy is a choice.

Ready to Lead with True North?

If you're ready to build a leadership style that:

  • Inspires trust

  • Strengthens culture

  • Drives performance

  • And creates lasting impact

Then it’s time to realign with your True North.

👉 Schedule a conversation: https://truenorthculture.org

Final Thought

The best leaders aren’t remembered for what they achieved.

They’re remembered for who they were — and how they made others feel.

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If Your Team Doesn’t Trust You, Nothing Else Works

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The New Leadership Imperative: Clarity, Alignment & Radical Resilience